I am a student, a daughter, a girlfriend, and a friend. I am a woman, a teacher, a listener, and......a human. I try and fulfill all of the "whose" and the "whats" that I am to fulfill...but I'm human.
The balance of social and academic worlds have been nearly impossible to maintain. Is there really such a thing? Can balance in this world really exist? Or is it just the time in which we are waiting for the balanced to fall.....
I want to be everything that I have been put on this earth to be. I want to succeed in school and in life as a friend. People over time, my tried and true motto, something I REFUSE to fail to live by....if I do anything, it will forever be that. SO...what about school, where does that fit in? Though that is neither 'people' nor 'time,' but isn't it worthy of being fit into such an equation....or is it just what should be filling the room left unused by the solution?? Finding this fit of both student and friend stress me out more then the actual duties of either...seems odd maybe, but it's where my weakness lies.
When I am lying near the end of my life and I look back, what will make me feel accomplished? That answer has always been easy for me....the impact I had on the lives of others.....personally....through the work of my own hands. I want to have made a dent in this huge world, even if that dent is not seen by many, but instead seen by few; I would rather have taken the time to have set aside the typical "priorities" our insanely chaotic society has thrown in front of us, and make some real difference.....problem is, isn't a larger difference going to be made by the way I live my life and the connections I have- and aren't the connections something I may attain by the place I have in the world of higher education and the workforce?
SOOOO after asking all of the questions I come back down to the root of it all. I want to do well in academia and be the best friend someone, anyone, could ever ask for.
Well the imbalance of my two entirely different spheres has seemed to collided and now here I am wondering, stressing over why it all feels so wrong. Why it all feels like I'm falling short in both areas. I guess I need to remember that I am human....I try as hard as I can and I have to remember it doesn't always feel right, but I do my best and everyone knows....I do my best.
Welcome
This is me....Celestan, all 5 feet 2 inches of respect. I love to love and to be loved, I love who I am and excited for who I will become. I am calmed by the sound of the thunder and the smell of rain. To be outside is to be at the most beautiful place on earth. I listen to dane cook, dance around my room, and laugh until I cry. I am strong but still cry, energetic but still love to sleep. I am perfect with all of my imperfections and believe the flaws of humankind is what makes someone who they are....
I hope to never sadden anyone, and only to fill them with joy and happiness...I am grateful for what I have, and thank those everyday who affect my life. I am who I am, will never lie, will never mislead. You see what you get.
I also have an amazing mother and brother, both of whom are very close to my heart...my mother is my best friend and I wouldn't have it any other way.
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